There have been times when I’ve ended up with a few tears during a meeting. How useless is that! In fact, it happened when I felt that I wasn’t being listened to and I was actually angry. After that I felt ‘less’. Less professional, less of a strong woman and less of a leader.
“Women often receive promotions based on their past achievements, while men are promoted based on their perceived future potential.” Glass
Power Gap#1 (of the 7 gaps) is “Not Recognizing Your Special Talents, Abilities and Accomplishments,” which 63% of professional women face today. When we have this gap—of failing to understand the important and unique things we’ve accomplished and created.- we find it very hard to thrive” and grow in our career
Read more at: https://kathycaprino.com/2024/01/5-ways-to-share-thought-leadership-on-linkedin-and-expand-your-career/
Frustration with meetings like that have sent me on a search to really understand how we can negotiate in meetings and acquire those all-important Deep Listening skills and the preplanning skills we need to be successful.
At uni’ I watched bemused as my lecturer, fell about laughing. (Well, not literally) after I’d told him that my ambition was to learn diplomacy, I had a keen sense of injustice and felt that I had to stand up for everyone and say what I felt was right.
Needing to be ‘right’ is something I managed to give away years ago but it’s been a long journey I can tell you. Realising that me being ‘right’, implied that I was adopting the moral high ground and therefore giving myself an elevatged status, could come at the expense of others.
That was the beginning of my journey to learn what, at the time, I called diplomacy. I’ve always been what some would call a bit feisty and perhaps didn’t ‘suffer fools gladly’ so I could be a bit abrupt.
Being able to work with a diverse range of people, being able to stand up to bossy people without losing it, being able to negotiate with your nearest and dearest and be sure that you’ll be heard is vital at work and at home.
There are 3 Phases to this roadmap for your growth. Phases that help you to be that leader, to be that confident negotiator, that person who gets what they want. (Click here to get your detailed Road Map)
Phase 1
Blow your own trumpet! Be your number one supporter.
Bragg tactfully, bookending your boast with thanks and gratitude. For example, don’t say,
“I closed that deal and the company made $2 million. It’s really great!”
Instead use the Bragg Sandwich and say,
“I’m so thankful I was able to work on this project. I closed the deal and the company made $2 million. It’s really great! It was a lot of hard work, but I’m so happy I had the opportunity.”
“A Woman’s Guide to Claiming your Space. Elizia VanCort
Bookend your ‘bragg’ with gratitude.
No – don’t squirm. Get over yourself.
You are that awesome person who deserves success. Be sure to bring to light how well you’ve done as you complete a project, make a new deal, organise an event or collaborate with your team. Keep a file, a journal, a folder on your computer where you describe your successes.
Phase 2
Get recognition for the value that you bring to the business. Take those positive outcomes and see how they relate to business goals.
Phase 3
Understand where your boss is coming from. What kind of communicator is he/ she? Do they expect stats’ or are they a big picture person?
What’s happening in the business right now that they’re dealing with?
Again, be prepared. Make some notes.
Women often receive promotions based on their past achievements, while men are promoted based on their perceived future potential.
Phase 4
Brainstorm the current activity at work – projects, developments and see what part you have played. Bring clarity to your role and align your goals with those of the company. Now you have a clear pathway to success.
Ladies, join me and the awesome Karen Winfield of PD Training for an introduction to negotiation. “Know your worth so that you can negotiate with confidence,’ will help to counteract that feeling of ‘less’, ‘not good enough’, hashtag#impostersyndrome
